Monday, February 4, 2008

Closer Look at Emotional Attachments

Do you ever feel that sting that comes from missing something or someone that you have become so comfortable with? Emotional attachment has always been one of the larger causes of depression, confusion, and resistance to what 'is' for human kind. I've started analyzing emotional attachment more than anytime in my life just in the last two months since it has been harnessing my happier emotions. The first two apartments we resided at here in Buenos Aires were very cozy and provided incredible comfort. Though, we only lived in each apartment for a month, I developed a strange attachment, especially our last apartment. Maybe it was because of the experiences that came in this home. We had our girlfriends from San Diego visiting for about three weeks, which also brought a very strong sense of 'home'. Their departure left me in a slight depression from the feeling of home and comfort the girls took with them. It's funny analyzing your own emotions and why you may become attached to some things and not others. It seemed I couldn't walk anywhere in our neighborhood with out rehashing some funny experience that we had with the girls. Maybe it was because the feeling of home and comfort the girls provided was more intense since we are in a completely flipped world. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying any of these emotional attachments are bad or searching for pity, I'm only trying to analyze the actual entity of emotional attachments.

A week ago, we moved out of our awesome apartment in Palermo to a large house that hosts 8 other international students along with Mike and I. Thus, time to battle the attachment of leaving luxurious Palermo for Montseraat, an area of the city that's a bit more dangerous at night but more cultural than 'posh' Palermo. I've never really been an emotionally attached type of person until my move to Buenos Aires, so closer analysis on my part has showed me that there is really nothing wrong with this. Things phase in and out of our life and my latest experiences with emotional attachments to places and people has provided a learning experience and an opportunity to gain a better understanding of myself and others. I think it is merely human nature to find attachment to something or someone that provides love, care, or comfort. I've yet to meet a person who has been able to bounce through relationships or changes without some discomfort or sense of loneliness. Perhaps, maybe this is one of our positive traits as it shows that we care enough about something or someone to develop some attachment. However, becoming attached to the idea of that something or someone may be where we go south with our emotions.

My latest reading is a book called Cut Thru written by Doc Lew Childre and it goes through the science of care and over-care in humans. He notes that all things that humans become attached to starts out with a sincere care to that entity, then some how turns into an over-care (attachment) and we become victims of our own care. Analyzing what makes the care turn into attachment is the basis of what I've been attempting to research through others and myself. If you've felt some sense of attachment to someone or something and have resisted the change that succeeded that feeling, you're not alone. Everyone experiences this, take a closer look at why your initial care developed into some sort of 'over-care'. Just remember, what you're attached to now will probably not be the same person or thing that you'll be attached to years down the road, so just sit back and be the spectator of these emotions in order to fully understand your emotional patterns.


jRags said...

wow.. that was a good read man. I know I have recently gone through many thoughts of emotional attachment myself with moving to Alabama. I guess I am fortunate compared to most of our friends - I have my parents here to keep me company, that makes it a little easier in my mind.

Nicole said...

that is all really well put. i've personally thought about the same topic...without having ever put my thoughts into words.
i think moving away from everyone you know and care about really puts things into perspective for you.
i look forward to reading more.

Anonymous said...

I see what you mean, I´ve been to Buenos Aires and I can tell you that people in Argentina is unique. The mixture of cultures makes Argentina such a perfect country. Palermo can be a little posh, but I stayed in an apartment in Palermo which was near the down town so it worked for me.
I hope I can go back, I miss Tango!